As the BrExit war heats up in the final run to the finish line, one news program here mentioned that the E.U. was banning the Electric Tea Kettle and that was as likely to drive the vote as anything financial.
What? I thought… Ban the kettle?! Have these folks no brain at all?
Never, ever, under any circumstance, mess with a Brits tea!
First off, do realize that the U.S.A. exists because King George messed with the tea tax. The “Americans” who tossed the tea in Boston Harbor were at the time of said tossing British Subjects. It was “messing with a Brits Tea” that got the whole fuss started in the first place. Had old King George left well enough alone and let us continue drinking tea in peace, we’d be saluting the Union Jack to this day. ( IMHO, of course.)
Sidebar on W.W.II: I have no idea if this is an apocryphal story or true. Told to me by my wife’s Dad, who was in W.W.II (USA Airborn, British liaison on D-Day to the Glider Corp and entered with them) and as an officer was not known for telling ‘whoppers’. The story goes that traditionally shelling stopped at tea time. IIRC, the setting was N. Africa. At tea, some Germans had the nerve to commence shelling and interrupted tea. Very uncivilized. The enraged Brits, advanced on the Germans until the source of the irritant was dispatched. Then resumed tea. It is a very bad idea it interrupt tea.
Now this? The E.U., blind to history, is going to mess with British tea?
A more astounding level of stupidity is hard to imagine…. so I checked.
EU to ban high-energy hair dryers, smartphones and kettles
By Bruno Waterfield, and Emily Gosden
3:01PM BST 28 Aug 2014
The European Union is considering pulling the plug on high-wattage hair dryers, lawn mowers and electric kettles in a follow up to its controversial ban on powerful vacuum cleaners.
A study ordered by the European Commission, currently in draft form, has identified up to 30 electrical appliances including lawn mowers, smart phones and kettles that could be covered by the EU’s Ecodesign directive outlawing high-wattage devices.
Günther Oettinger, the German EU energy commissioner, said that legislation preventing consumers from buying high-wattage appliances was necessary to fight climate change.
“We haven’t got round to these devices yet, we want curb power consumption,” he told Bild newspaper. “All EU countries agree that energy efficiency is the most effective method to reduce energy consumption and dependence on imports and to improve the climate. Therefore there needs to be mandatory consumption limits for small electrical appliances.”
The proposals will be a controversial flagship policy for Jean-Claude Juncker when he takes power as commission president in November in order to meet a binding target for energy savings of 30 per cent across the EU by 2030.
Clearly they have zero clue about physics. To boil a cup of water takes a specific number of watt-hours (or joules) of energy. Can’t change it. Might as well try to legislate the value of pi. Now a “high power” kettle will get their quickly, and a low power one very slowly. Which is more efficient? As the hot kettle constantly leaks heat to the environment, the fastest kettle is always the most efficient. It’s physics, folks.
I’ve tested this, indirectly. I was using a kettle on a camp stove for a while (don’t need to leave my desk to make tea. Not that I’m compulsive about tea… but Mum was a Brit ;-) On a slow camp stove, fuel consumption was significantly higher. On my fastest stove, fuel was much more efficiently used, simply because waste heat is minimized then.
So first clear “Strike One” is just being so incredibly stupid as to confound wattage with efficiency.
Second clear “Strike Two” is not knowing enough about heat flow to realize most rapid heating is most efficient. For maximum efficiency, make it the highest wattage possible. Their behaviour is backassward to reality.
Third clear “Strike Three” is fooling around with a Brits Tea. That is just suicidal! IF they have proceeded with this, I predict the demise of the E.U. in about 3 years (or however long it took the U.S.A. to stop being British and get their tea back as American Tea…)
But Wait! The Millennials!!
Then they compound it with an attack on the Smartphone?
Have they no love of their own life? An entire generation of Millennials lives in their Smartphone. To expect to think you can tell them they can’t have the smartphone they want is to invite Holy Hacker Jihad on your computers!
My God Man, have you no fear? Even the Pakistanis and Indians will be after you for this one. No computer will be safe. You will have nowhere to hide (your secret data). Customer Support, once they see the call is from Brussels, will suddenly lose their Queen’s English and revert to the most severe Hyderabad accent. Your curry will arrive at table cold, and bland. Oh, the humanity!
I fear for the safety of all in Brussels should they proceed with this.
For their own safety, Britain must secede from the E.U., and fast. For the peace of all, vote Brexit now! To do otherwise is to risk civil war, the collapse of nations, revolution and the complete collapse of the internet and computing (at least in Brussels) not to mention cold bland curry.
A worse fate can not be imagined.
(Though many in power and the media are trying very very hard to drum up something greater than Y2k as a Brexit FUD).
So please remember tomorrow to vote to save the Kettle, and the world as we know it. It all depends on you now. Chose wisely: Vote to Save The Kettle!