All love starts out unconditional, then decays through stages to end in transactional, or simply evaporate.
Infatuation is a sort of unconditional love. One party loves the other, who starts out clueless.
Parents unconditionally love their children (at least until the Terrible Twos or Teens, depending ;-)
Infants unconditionally love their parents; right up to the same points.
Then things transition to Conditional Love.
IFF You REALLY loved me, you would…
Yes I love you, BUT…
You would let me date them… or: but do your homework then…
A guy gets the Hots for a girl who has the Hots for him. Neither is counting coup. A few years later, she is unhappy that he only Rubbed Her Up for three minutes while she Licked His Balls for four. The Transactional Stage has begun.
The degenerate, or end stage, is just love as an item of commerce. Prostitution.
I’m not against it. Sex for money is no worse than Faux love for money. More honest in many ways. But how do you get there?
We all start out alone in a stange new world. Our parents are expected to love us as their own flesh. This works for a while, until the parent realizes this is not Mini Me, but a unique person.. and we realize these “providers” come with Rule Making attached.
Then unconditional transitions to conditional.
I love you BUT
Clean up you room.
Let me go to the game.
Do your chores, then we will talk.
If you really loved me, you would let me…
Does my dog love me unconditionally or because I provide free food, so transactional?
This is a fundamental question to most interactions. Political or financial.
Where am I in the spectrum from unconditional to conditional to transactional to commercial love?
Somebody must be the First Mover who loves unconditionally. Gets the Pound Puppy. Has the infatuation. Says “I Love You!” First. Otherwise we all end up in the desert of commercial, transactional love. Alone.
I chose to love my spouse unconditionally.
I chose to love my children unconditionally.
I chose to love my dog unconditionally.
I chose to accept my infatuation with my biracial grocery clerk unconditionally, while also accepting my love of my spouse unconditionally, so don’t mention it to either…
Choose more unconditional love, and upgrade from conditional or transactional love. Somebody must to improve things, so be somebody. Even if all you do is kiss your dog…
In this video, Sting points out Cheb Mami as an equal or better singer. A true love of a fellow artist. In most English presentations Cheb is treated as at best a backup singer. But not to Sting.
I’d originally had some thing else in mind. But this caught my attention as a transactional thing. The horse has power, the woman has intelligence. Together they have something special as a transactional love. Same music as above.
The other teansactional…
Love your spouse and your children unconditionally.
It is the best thing you can do to increase the love in the world.
Avoid negative energy sinks full of hate and commercial “love”.
Chose to love unconditionally. Someone. Somewhere.
Kick to the curb grumpy unhappy people devoid of love only lusting after transactions (Clinton) or commerce (Schiff / Nadler / Pelosi).
Life is too short to drink bad wine or suffer a loveless existance. Love is something you get by giving. There are plenty of opportunities to give.